Here is our little babe "bogi" waving. They told me this was a "fifth digit picture, but I like "the waving picture".

This ultrasound in particular was very moving for me. I've already had 6. That's the good thing..i get lots of ultrasounds (almost every visit) and it really makes me feel very connected to the little bud inside me. I still worry but I am constantly reassured every time I see the little image on the screen and hear that the measurements are right on. This time it was amazing because the doc went through every single picture and explained all the terms and body parts (except for THE body part) He told me about how the heart has 4 chambers and how the top left chamber is just a bit bigger than the right and that the two on the bottom will become connect moments after the baby takes it's first breath. To see that little baby with 2 inch long femur bones having that rapid heart beat just took my breath away and a little tear slipped down my cheek. To say that conception, birth, and keeping a baby alive till their 30! is a miracle is understated. I'm in awe of my Heavenly Father and his plan and his creations.

21 1/2 weeks. Seriously, i'm not vain but when you look at this picture please notice that there is an extra black inch running up and down because of the shadow. What the heck shadow! I wanted a 20 week picture and since I finally got my act together and took a picture this one will have to do. But I think I feel and look about like I did with Ezra. I think at this point with Chloe I still hadn't even told the students i taught. Crazy cool how your body changes.

Today we came home from church and EZ fell asleep in the van the last couple of minutes as usual. I woke him up and set him inside, as usual, so I could get the doors shut and grab my bag. Chloe and I walked in to this. He was snoozing so deep we could hear snoring. Priceless!

EZ's "blank"

This is actually kind of amazing so stick with me on this long post.

First of all...this kid loves his blanket. He really started to get "attached" to is when we moved. it really became a security thing for him and he just loves it and gets very very excited when he sees it or we hand it to him.

So, today he came down stairs this morning (with the blanket). When nap time came I couldn't find said blanket. Chloe and I searched and searched and no blanket. Finally I tried to put him to sleep without it and he just whimpered so sadly and pathetically that I had to keep looking. I remembered he came down to the basement with it while I was doing laundry. Sure enough he had dropped it through the slots in the stairs and it lay there crumpled in a forgotten corner behind all our "shtuff!"We were saved and he was so happy and it made my heart smile to see his face.

He wakes up from nap and we were rushing to get to a birthday party. I literally woke him up, lifted him from bed (blanket in all I now find out) put his shoes on and carried him out to the stroller where we then proceeded to walk to the birthday party. I do faintly remember putting the seatbelt on him and having to move something out of the way to get to the seatbelt but we were in a hurry so whatever.

As we were walking and collecting leaves along the way, EZ started to cry a little and say "blank" "blank" which kind of sounds like "dink" "dink" which is drink. Whatever EZ we're in a hurry to get to the party stop your whining dude. So we went on. To my credit I did look to see what he was pointing at and I couldn't see anything in the basket below his seat.

So now it's bedtime and we (chloe and I, brad is at work) began the process of looking for his blanket again. Couldn't find it. I went down to check between the slots in the stair...no blanket. Finally, I couldn't bear putting my little guy to bed without his comfort when it hit my like lightning. I bet it fell on the walk! Seriously, that's how it happened. So, I ran quickly (locked the kids inside) ran up the road and found his sweet blanket crumpled in the middle of the dirty road but safe. I grabbed it and ran back past my nice neighbor who inquired about my run and I said, huffing mind you cause these pregnant bones haven't fun fast fast for a while, "i found my little guy's blanket in the road" And he said, "wow you just got some help from you know who." and he point to heaven.

it's true. Chambers sleep well tonight.

20 years ago...seriously?!

I can't believe it's been 20 years.

20 years ago (today, give or take a day because really i had been sick for quite sometime)

My mom held the hand of her 60 lb frail and pail 11 year old and took her to the doctor to see "what was up."

We left with the words "possibly diabetic" and a were told a time to go to the nearby hospital for a glucose test. All I new about diabetes was what Ms. Macky had told us in 5th grade and I still remember her making it sound very very grim. Without going into lots of details that can't ever be changed I was official labeled a DIABETIC 20 years ago today. I really cannot believe it's been 20 years that I've been Melanie the Diabetic. Sometimes I don't think that it defines me but then I remember that as I test my blood 8 times a day and give a shot for every little thing I put in my body or think about ever little carbohydrate I've eaten or will eat or when the next meal will come or what I will do if there is no meal for awhile or what happens if for some reason I can't feel a low bloodsugar...i remember that being diabetic is really a very very significant part of who i am and a very big part of my life.

I prefer most people to not know I am diabetic. I realize that some people just don't know about diabetes and what it is and how to approach it. But just know, most people could care less that I'm diabetic and that's cool. I do like to talk about it if it comes up but usually it comes up in some setting where it would be awkward to interject that piece of news. I think I went through all of highschool with just a handful of people knowing, college even less knew, and then when I started having these babies, well, everyone finds out everything about you (there's just know privacy anymore, right?)

1. Diabetis Mellitus (Type 1) is what I have. My pancreas just stopped working and won't ever start again. Most people get Type 1 when they are young which is why it's often called Juvenile onset Diabetes. It is controlled by artificial insulin. A normal person's body knows how much and when to give the body insulin. Diabetics check their blood sugar to see where the blood sugar is at then decide how much insulin to give in addition to calculating what they will eat and doing a carb to insulin ratio and give a shot based on that number. Math in everyday life! Yes, I love it!!So, contrary to oldschool diabetic info, diabetics can eat sugar (but really is that much sugar good for anyone) I just try to avoid lots of simple sugars like candy, juice, soda, syrups, jams, but I will eat sweet homemade treats.

2. Lots of type 1 Diabetics where pumps. You still have to have a brain to use a pump, it doesn't think for you...yet. The pro of a pump is that insulin drips into your body for 24 hours and replicates a human pancreas to some extent. You still have figure out how much to give and still have to account for all the food you eat. Others (me) prefer the multiple injection theory where you just give multiple shots throughout the day to act like a pancreas. I like being in control of when I give my shot. I don't trust that this little box won't malfunction and go off when it's not supposed to or what if it got jammed? Research supports both and doesn't say that the pump is better. But...I would say that the first question I always get asked is "Why don't you have one of those pump things?" Probably never, unless it can start reading your bloodsugars for a 24 hours time period reducing the amount of times I had to test my blood. Now that would be cool and I'm sure someone somewhere is on that.

2. Type 2 Diabetes is what a majority of the world has and what all the Biggest Loser contestants cry about getting (they cry about that more than high blood pressure, high cholesterol, aching joints, sore muscles) It's usually brought on by weight gain or high BMI and can be controlled by meds, diet and exercise. In many cases it goes away or severely improves with weight management.

3. I've known a lot of diabetics. Most are very very very attentive to what they eat and are kind of crazy exercisers (me.) Others are very very very out of control and you may know some that are blind, have amputated limbs or fingers or toes or who have severe kidney, heart, or eye issues. The body is funny...it's all connected and when one thing is broken other things don't really appreciate it so much so you have to be careful.

4. Being diabetic and pregnant is doable (3rd time baby!) but you have to be very cautious and careful and go to the doctor, oh say, like 100 times a pregnancy. It makes for some great times:)

For the most part I can honestly say that I have never really been mad that I'm diabetic. I remember learning how to give my own shot the first night in the hospital and asking when it was time for me to leave and get home and get on with my life. I think they were shocked and impressed that an 11 year old would take it that way. I think that because I knew it was so permanant and would never go away I have embraced it and never once resented it and my life has been dreamy and not full of sickness or illness brought on by not taking care of myself.

I listened to General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day saints (most people can link up to all these cool things but I'm not really sure how to do that so if you want to learn more go to lds.org) this weekend and I am so proud to be a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. My knowledge of the gospel and the plan of salvation and the Savior's love for me individually helps me so much...every moment of every day. I know that I get down during trials, especially the trials I really hope will go away but I've been so glad that at somepoint when I was a weak 11 year old that I had prayers said in my behalf and a priesthood blessing given to me that all blessed me to "be able to bear the burdens this illness would bring" and man have I been blessed by those blessing for the last 20years.

So, here's to 20 more years...plus 20 more.